You know that there are times when people know that you have a bad attitude, but still accepts and puts up with that because the job still gets itself done. But it's times like these. Times when potential excuses run through your mind, but none of them seem the least plausible. And you know that it's really all your fault.
I am so guilty and ashamed I feel like I'm gonna throw up.
The combination of bad attitude and irresponsibility always make me want to secretly punch a person. And now that I know that I'm being both churlish and irresponsible, I honestly feel twice the sick and helplessness. What the fuck do I do now? Sometimes, the worst troubles are the invisible ones whose extents are at the mercy of your own imagination and thinking.
What happened to being full of fight and knowing your place? I'm such a shithead.
