now that i finally have some free time on my hands... i think i should really start reviving my long-neglected blog. well, not that anyone cares, but i think that typing on a keyboard is really different from writing it out. you think twice about your diction, and you would triple check your blog post before publishing it, lest you offend someone out there. ha.
so, months have passed and many things seem to have sorted themselves out, for better or for worst. the melodramatic resignation for one has been so stressful. sometimes, i wonder if it's really a world where it's every man for themselves? i don't know, but if thrs anything that i have taken away from this experience at the Company, it's that people will react to the moment and never to your history. you may have thought that they were nice, and they might have thought that you were nice, but when humans get overwhelmed by their emotions in a moment, memories and impressions from the past are but like pencil scribbles that can be easily erased. how tragic right?
that makes me worried. i don't know if they are unfounded, but what if everyone's like this? what if in a single moment, people in their sensitivity disregard memories and impressions. i think i'll be wrecked if the people around me suddenly turn their backs on me. i'm trying my best to stifle such thoughts, but as unwarranted as they may be now, their possible relevance in a future situation still scares the heck out of me.
but one door closed, is another one opened. so while in the midst of the ugly, hasty, retreat from my previous workplace, another opportunity has opened. i'm working for a mr. chung now and hopefully what i'll get out of this is more than what i have thought i'll get. must really focus on my training and stop being so whiny every time because nothing will ever taste as good as being skinny feels. right?
love.
